12 Years On- My Diabetes Journey

The 18th February 2004 was the day my life changed forever. 

It was around Christmas 2003 when my Mum started noticing slight changes in my behaviour, such as eating and drinking excessively, as well as getting up for the toilet 3-4 times during the night, and she immediately suspected that I had developed diabetes. However, being a typical parent, she tried to push these thoughts to the back of her mind, as she didn't want to accept the fact that I may have this incurable disease. A few weeks later I started having to wear glasses after complaining about blurred vision, and Mum decided to take me to the Doctors. 

I remember the events of that day quite clearly. Once in the Doctors consulting room, a quick test showed that I had 20.9 mmol/L (or 372 mg/dL) of glucose in my blood, and I was therefore diagnosed with Type 1 diabetes. As I was only seven years old, I had no idea what this meant, as I had never heard the terms 'pancreas', 'insulin' and 'diabetes' before, and so understandably I was extremely confused and overwhelmed with everything that was happening. I remember bursting into tears after being told I would have to go to hospital, as I had never been before and so I had no idea what was going to happen. I remember thinking that I would have to be there by myself without either of my parents, so it was extremely scary and daunting for seven year old me! When we arrived at hospital we were taken to a room where everything was explained to my parents and I but, as I was so young, pretty much every piece of information passed over my head. It was as the consultation was coming to an end and we were getting ready to settle into hospital life for the next week that I had my first panic attack, probably triggered by the overwhelming and confusing emotions I had experienced over the course of the day. 

However, despite my initial worry regarding hospitals, I actually managed to almost enjoy my time there, so much so that I was sad to be leaving after my 5 day stay. I would watch TV in my little bed and play with my sister in the playroom, and I loved receiving a number of gifts from each of my family members, all of whom came to visit me during my stay. I even looked forward to the food trolley, despite the insulin injection that would have to be given to me after two of my meals from now on. 

For the first couple of years after my diagnosis my parents were quite strict with my lifestyle, and I was only allowed to eat small amounts of sugar and could only drink diet drinks. I remember becoming quite frustrated whenever my classmates would buy bags full of sweets and chocolate at the school tuck shop whilst I was only allowed to buy one little treat. Eventually though, around the age of eleven, I increased the number of injections I had to have to 4 a day, which meant that I could be a bit more lenient with my diet, as well as have better control over my blood glucose levels. However, this meant I had to start injecting myself at school, which again made me feel different from the rest of my classmates.

For me, the hardest part of growing up with this disease was becoming a teenager and going through puberty. This is an extremely difficult and confusing time for any young person, what with the raging hormones affecting you both physically and emotionally, but suffering with diabetes on top of that makes it an even harder experience. My teenage years wreaked havoc with my blood glucose readings, which became quite erratic and uncontrolled, due to hormones and stresses at school, as well as the panic attacks and anxiety that I started suffering with from the age of fifteen. Despite all of the frustrating emotions and changes however, I miraculously survived being a teenager with diabetes, and I managed to deal with teenage challenges, such as exams at school, without too much worry about my condition.

At this point in time, twelve years after I was first diagnosed, I am much more content with the fact that I will probably be suffering with this disease for the rest of my life, as well as being much happier with the way I control and manage my condition. I currently carb count at every meal, which involves entering all of the carbohydrates that I am going to consume into a little machine which then tells me how much insulin I should inject into myself, based on the amount of glucose in my blood at the time. This has led to me having a more normal range of blood glucose readings (which should be between 4 and 7 mmol/L) as well as a better average reading at the hospital appointments I attend every three months. Compared to my earlier teenage years, I have much more control over this condition now, and I can lead my normal everyday life without feeling different or abnormal from everyone else. 

I decided to write this post today as a kind of reflection over the last twelve years of my life, as I have never really opened up about my experience fully before. For me, having diabetes is just a normal part of my life now, and I can't really remember a time where I didn't have to worry about when and what I was going to eat. I am always slightly surprised and taken aback whenever I receive sympathy off someone after telling them that I have this condition, as it is just a normal and natural part of me now, the same way that having brown eyes or size 4 feet is. In a way, having this condition made me much more mature than my peers, even at the age of seven, and I feel like I somehow missed out on having a completely carefree childhood, as there is always a constant stream of thoughts going through your mind when you suffer with this disease. However, I do believe it has ultimately made me a stronger as a person, as I have managed to cope quite well with the stresses and worries that often accompanies Type 1 diabetes.

I thought I would end this post by listing a few little facts about my diabetes journey that you may find interesting...

•  I have at least 1,460 injections a year, which worked out to at least 14,600 injections over the course of the last twelve years- it's a good job I'm not scared of needles!
• The lowest my blood glucose level has ever been is 1.2 mmol/L, which happened one holiday in Wales
• I have had hypoglycemic attacks so bad that I actually have no recollection of what happened
• I loved it whenever we had to study diabetes as part of my biology lessons as I always aced the topic! 
• Having this condition is one of the reasons why I am going to study human biology at university to be a scientist in the future, as I have grown up with a knowledge of human anatomy and physiology

 I hope you have found this post interesting, I know it was a long one! It was quite a different one for me to write, as well as being quite weird recounting the last twelve years of living with this condition. 

Thank you for reading,

Megan